The Unrealiable Spokesperson and the Robotic Being
by hellcatfighter
Summary: Should the spokesperson be trusted? To be, or not to be? That is the question.


Being a government spokesperson is not easy. First of all, you have to answer stupid questions from the reporters. Secondly, you have to listen to your boss you what to say, even though it is obviously a lie. Thirdly, you have to endure nightmares of your boss trying to stab you in bed because you reported something wrong. You see, that's what I am. I'm Nick Inkler, spokesperson for the U.S. government. Yes, that's me on the television.

Since you want to know what my spokesperson life is like, I'll show you an example. Here I am talking about robotic beings. Now let's let the earlier me take over…

"Now, now, madams and sirs, I assure you that there are no such things as robotic beings." I managed to shout out over the din.

"Who says? I heard that there were some reports of a huge alien robot battle in Mission City." Said a particularly annoying red-headed reporter.

"Lady, are you sure? Mission city's a huge… city. The newspapers would report that if it really happened. And since when had you questioned your own industry?" I glared at her pointedly. She took the cue and sat down immediately.

Since the reporters continued to yapper a long, I resorted to drastic measures. "We recently passed a law to restrict the amount of questions asked in a press conference. I think the amount of questions to be asked is ten. We have definitely reached the amount of questions for today. So, who wants to be court-martialled?" The room quieted down quickly. "Great. This is the end of the press conference."

I stepped out of the room and walked right into my boss. "Great work there sonny, but I think you overstepped it a little. You shouldn't have threatened those reporters. Now that will get on the news…" The boss seemed to think for a moment. "I think you should get a desk job…maybe get out of the spotlight for a moment…"

I could hardly contain myself. "You can't do that! You know I'm the best guy for the spokesperson job!" Whoops. Missed saying boss.

"Sorry, sonny. But I still think you should get keep a low profile until this thing calms over." The boss' voice was apologetic but firm.

I signed and said, "Yes, boss."

Now back to the present me. I was being confined to a stupid desk job now while reporters gathered around my house daily at nighttime to protest against 'Cruelty against reporters'. What junk. How about 'Cruelty to spokespersons'? Anyway, I was at my home one night with the whining reporters outside yelling slogans and throwing rotten tomatoes at my house. I was very sober at that time. I clearly did not drink. But I had a slight headache and a slight dizziness. It's was only slight. Very slight. No, no. I definitely didn't drink. Since I was feeling a bit woozy, I decided to doze for a moment before returning to work.

After thirty minutes, screams and yells from outside the house woke me up. I stumbled out of bed and looked out of the window. There was nothing except a few banners and rotten tomatoes on the ground. I retired back to bed after a few moments. After five minutes, I heard a muffled sound on the lawn. I groaned and got out of the bed and stared out. There was, I don't know how to describe it, a…a…a robotic being right outside my house, with his optics staring out at me! It was massive. My bedroom was on the second floor, and he was on eye level with me. It then talked to me! "Are you Nick Inkler, spokesperson for the U.S. government?"

The only thing I could do was to gape. "Are you Nick Inkler, spokesperson for the U.S. government?" It yelled at me. The sound was deafening. Shouldn't my neighbors hear it?

"Yes, yes. I was. I mean I am. What do you went? I mean want?"

"You will tell the world that there are robotic things. Do you understand?"

"What?"

"I said you will tell the world that there are robotic things. Do you understand?" Its voice was even louder than thunder. Why aren't the neighbors coming?

"Yes, yes, of course I do. What did you say again?"

"I SAID YOU WILL TELL THE WORLD THAT THERE ARE ROBOTIC THINGS. DO YOU UNDERSTAND?" My eardrums are definitely going to explode. Come on, where's the police?

"Yes. No need to yell. But I must say that I am not a spokesperson. I got suspended." The robotic being cocked its head as if listening to instructions.

"You will not need to worry about that." Its chest suddenly burst out and a small robotic being landed on my head. I was so tired I fell asleep. (No! I didn't faint! Stop it!)I could hear the words 'I am the Doctor!' before I fainted, I mean, I fell asleep.

I woke up to my phone buzzing. I had a splitting headache, and I answer half-heartedly with a yawn. "What?"

"Where are you? The press release is going on in about forty-five minutes!" The boss's voice was slightly muffed.

"So? I thought I was doing desk work boss."

"Well, it's the robot thingy again, so I thought it would be you who should do it and say it out again. Anyway, even if you're doing your desk job, you should have arrived there a hour and a half earlier."

I groaned as I looked at the clock. "Why is it always me who gets to do those hard things?"

"See ya at the press conference!"

"Holy Crap!" I muttered. I had forty-five minutes to get dressed eat breakfast, and take a taxi to the White House.

As soon I arrived at the Preparation Press Release Room, the boss stuck a script into my hand. His eyes were slightly disconcerted. "Here. You'll need it."

It seems that a lot of 'robotic beings' were sighted on the East coast of America, even in Washington D.C. Maybe even the one I saw. But it seems that they're denying it. Aw, I hate my headache.

"Hey, you're up." The boss said, glancing at his watch.

I went out to the hostile crowds. "What about this thing? This robotic being?" I dimly heard a reporter yelling. The snapping and flashing of the cameras are annoying as I walk onto the platform. And my headache! I took a deep breath and face the crowd of hostile reporters. I could see the annoying red-head reporter up in front. She seemed to be yelling something, but I couldn't hear her above the din of the headache. What torture! I looked down at the script and the first line.

"Ladies and Gentlemen, I am here to announce that-"I paused as I looked up from my script "there are things such as robotic beings."

My headache! I could dimly see my boss nodding his head. I fainted on the spot before all hell broke loose. Black. All I could see was black. Then the cold…


End file.
